(originally published on LinkedIn Pulse) 2/11/16
Queen Bey lost her balance.
Yep – we’ve all seen the clips. There she was, in all her amazing fierceness and absolutely owning the half-time show, and it happened.
She crouched down quickly, fully intending to pop back up strong. (Seriously, those dance moves in those heels!) But, instead of a quick and powerful push straight up, she bobbled a bit and had to jump back and catch her balance before she popped back up.
The important thing is that she DID pop back up. She didn’t fall. She regained her balance and continued.
Temporarily losing your balance is normal. I’m talking about the day-to-day reality we live in. Sometimes things just don’t go as planned. Life happens. And, likely without even thinking about it, you find ways to bounce back – to take a quick little balance-check and pop back up. You’re fiercer than you give yourself credit for!
- Hit the snooze button one too many times, and now you’re late for work. Yet you go to work. You bobble, you don’t fall, and you continue.
- Late on a project for work, and now you have to explain it to your boss. You take responsibility and own it. You hop backwards, but you go on.
- Lost your job due to company layoffs. You add new LinkedIn connections and take this opportunity to reconnect and find an even better job. You stagger, but you step forward.
- Give in on a punishment for your child because you just don’t have the energy. You realize this isn’t one of those times where safety takes precedence. You bend a little, and you move on.
- Didn’t close a sale and missed your revenue target. You assess the situation and reach out to more prospects. You regroup, and you proceed.
It’s really all about RESILIENCE. The capacity to recover quickly. Some people seem to have a natural resiliency: each time they falter, they recover in an even grander fashion. They take the daily “oops” in stride and even the major setbacks barely slow them down.
History is full of people who failed time and again, kept getting back up and trying again until it worked. Oprah, Walt Disney, Bill Gates, J.K. Rowling, Michael Jordon, Thomas Edison, Vincent Van Gough, the list of resilient people who failed and finally succeeded goes on and on.
How can you build up your resilience? Exercise those muscles and practice resiliency. You can learn to regain your balance when you stumble without falling.
- Focus on the positives. You tried something. You learned something from the experience. No blood and no broken bones.
- Keep control of your emotions. It’s ok to be emotional – you’re human. Step back from your emotions in the heat of the moment and revisit them later, when you have the advantage and perspective of time.
- Make a Plan B, Plan C, Plan D… There is always another approach. It’s just that sometimes that other option doesn’t reveal itself until you’ve failed at the first one. Or the second one.
- Find your support system. A shared challenge is much lighter than carrying the load alone. Colleagues, family and friends are willing to help you, you simply need to ask.
- Give yourself a break! Treat yourself the way you’d treat a girlfriend. Self-talk in positive language. Accept that you’re not perfect. Pamper yourself a little to give yourself a boost.
- Dust yourself off, and keep moving. The key is to not stand still – keep moving. It’s said that sharks will drown if they stop moving. That’s the same for us – if you wallow and stay in one place out of fear or pain, you’ll drown.
I say, be Beyoncé!
Wear the stilettos! Dance! And, if you happen to lose your balance, take a little hop. Then you can push back up, stronger than ever!
Kari Skloot, The Life-Work Coach, helps working moms reduce their stress and in turn find more energy and connection with the many different aspects of their life and their work. After more than 25 years working in organizations of all shapes and sizes, both for-profit and non-profit, Kari has pretty much “been there, done that”. A mother of a 15-year-old son and married more than 26 years, she’s a speaker, author and professional coach specializing in Life-Work Balance. Kari works with individuals, organizations and businesses to teach people how to flip their thinking about what a successful Life-Work Balance can mean for each of us.